(by zhuoming)
I am so surprised that jiayue comment on both Zhaohong and Yuheng, so I am commenting on jiayue's comment first. A good point in jiayue's comment is that she compared the two passage, which makes it easier for us to see the respective advantages of each passage. Her comparasion is in series, which creats points to points comparasions, rather than point to point comparation. An advantage os this is that it indicates readers what are the respective outline and main ideas of each auther and it makes the comparasion clear. After the comparation, she gives some suggestions to each author, which are quite practical. finally, she gives her point to summary and end her comment.
For me, as the two summaries are already compared quite completely by jiayue, I just want to give some suggestions for writting a summary. For this summary, I think a good way to organize is to make a comparasion as jiayue.
I am not saying this because comparasion is a good form for passage, I am saying this because there is a lot to compara between the two lecturers, one is more formal and scientific while the other is easier to understand and related to our daily life, and the difference in their contents makes their characters of speech different, one is more serious while the other is more humorous. So if we write our summary in a comparasion style, maybe it would be easier for readers to get a clear outline of the whole lecture and really remenber something and put them in our real life, but their summaries are already very good, I am just giving some suggestions, which are inspired by jiayue.
A little long, thanks for reading and welcome commenting on my comment!
PS: I still upload my comment as I did the day before yesterday, so I have to write again and post my comment.
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