Zhuoming’s essay started off with a funnel introduction, whereby he begins with a general sentence about the topic. Subsequently, each following sentence becomes narrowing onto the topic until the last sentence which states the main point of the whole essay.
Zhuoming seems to have some difficulties expressing his thoughts through writing due to his inconsistent sentences. Some of the sentences are not comprehensible as well. This problem might be due to direct translation from the Chinese language to English language.
I realized that this essay is off topic due to the fact that it is not related to either one of the Writing Assignment 1’s questions. On the other hand, there is unity in each paragraph stating each factor contributing to Global Warming. In addition, the reasons and suggested solutions of each factor are stated at the end of each paragraph.
Due to the lack of expression usage to link the gap between the paragraphs, it gives the impression that the paragraphs are not related to each other. On the other hand, he did a good job in using a lot of transition signals such as ‘however’ and ‘but’.
The conclusion of this essay ends with a question, “If we are doing the same thing day by day, how could we expect a different result?” This is an effective ending because it probes the readers to think about how they can change their daily lifestyles to alleviate the factors contributing to Global Warming.
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